
We just got back from a Trunk or Treat event at our church, where people decorate the trunks of their cars and park in the lot, and the kids go around to all the cars to get candy. They also had inflatables, cotton candy, hot dogs, chips, and lemonade, hot chocolate and cider, and a few other little games. We went last year, too, but Noelle was obviously more able to enjoy it this year. She was a ladybug, as you can see to the right. She didn't want to wear the hood, so we used it to store her candy. Candy was definitely Noelle's favorite part. On the way home, she was repeating all the things she had said to get candy. "Turk or Treat!" "I'd LOVE some!" What a goof.
Last night, Andy and I went on a big date night. We went to dinner at The Melting Pot, which was a lot of fun and so good. How can you go wrong with dipping bits of food in cheese and chocolate? We had a great waiter, but I think they are all trained to be that way. Every waiter I saw acted like they were assigned to us, making sure we were taken care of. After dinner we walked down Broadway downtown and did the tourist thing a while. They certainly perpetuate the myth that Nashville is all about country music on that strip! Then we made it to our hotel where we stayed overnight downtown, and in the morning we went out to breakfast at a local place called Fido. Andy dropped me off at the hotel to have a few more hours to myself while he came home and relieved our friends that had been taking care of Noelle. I spent my time taking a nice long shower, reading a book, and watching a little tv. It was very nice.
All the while, of course, I was thinking about Charlotte. Today was her due date, and all week I have been thinking about how she should be in my arms now. We drove past the hospital on our way to breakfast, and I teared up thinking about the fact that I wasn't there this week, and that I was there 5 months ago and came home brokenhearted.
One of my friends tonight asked me if I had been able to ask God yet what purpose he had in all this, and although I don't know that the answer makes it any easier, I really feel like He revealed that to us early on. Andy and I both decided from the first moment that this had to be something that brought us closer to each other and closer to God, or what was the point in all the suffering. Charlotte's death has put a lot of strain on our family, to be sure, but I think more than that it has bonded us in a way that we weren't bonded before. I have a new desire to know the Lord in a deeper way, and especially to know more about Heaven and His promises for us.
This week I read a little book my mom gave me after Charlotte died called "I'll Hold You in Heaven." It talks about what the Bible says about miscarried, stillborn, and aborted babies - their souls, whether they are in Heaven, and if we will meet them. It talks about how Jesus, when he was barely conceived, caused John to jump in Elizabeth's womb, and how John, 3 months from being born, was already fulfilling his role of announcing the coming of Jesus. Then it talks about David, and his son with Bathsheba that died a few days after he was born, and how David rejoiced and said his son would not return, but that he would be with his son. The book meant a lot to me this week, and really helped me to be able to claim Charlotte as my daughter and a part of my family that is just experiencing Heaven before I do. I know now that I will tell people who ask me how many kids I have that I have two daughters. One on earth, and one in Heaven.
They all loved them. Noelle even had some of the leftovers for breakfast this morning and she was so proud that she was eating leaves!
Andy Matthews - October 31, 2007 07:03 amWow!! I'm impressed! What a cool idea. The presentation looks so good on that bright plate. Sounds like you will do great as a "school mom".
Carol - October 31, 2007 07:53 am